Work Life Balance in 3 Steps
The key? Plan for it. Be strategic about it. Book it in your calendar. Don't reschedule it. Is it really that easy? Maybe.
I was speaking with a client last week on this very topic. She’s going back to work after being a stay at home mom for 7 years. (By the way… She got this job in our weakened economy, even though considered an underdog because of the gap in her resume, with some hard work and a creative approach. Set up a call with me and I’ll share her secret with you!). One of her main concerns was maintaining balance in her life as she adds this new dimension to it. The conversation went something like this:
Judith “What are you most concerned with, as you get ready to start this new job?”
Client “I am worried about keeping a sense of balance in my life. I know that I typically don't do anything half way and my tendency is to put in overtime, in order to do a good job. And to make matters worse, I’m only working 32 hours per week, replacing someone else that worked 40, so I feel like I’m already going to be behind. My kids aren’t used to me being gone. I want my family life to not be affected by this.”
Judith “Yes, you've got a lot on the go for sure, and this job is going to add to it. What are you willing to give up, in order to add this responsibility in? You’re not super woman here… Something has to give.”
Client “I’ve given myself permission to not workout the first 90 days, until I adjust. I’m also considering hiring someone to help out with meal prep. But I’m still worried.”
Judith “What do you usually sacrifice when things get busy?”
Client “My sleep. And then I’m so tired that I live on caffeine the next day. But it’s a vicious cycle. If I have caffeine too late in the day, I’m awake all night. I can’t have that when I'm starting a new job.”
Judith “Okay, what else ?”
Client “I don’t take time to eat or I eat poorly”
Judith “ I see a pattern here. You compromise your values and sabotage your health. You’re putting yourself last in this equation, aren’t you? You’re in full control, to be able to balance your life, but you’re choosing not to.”
Client “Yes I hadn't thought of it that way.”
Judith “What would it look like for you to prioritize yourself and what you truly need?”
At this point in the conversation, we came up with some basic techniques for her to employ, in order to ensure that her Work Life Balance could be manageable.
Give and Take. This is a zero sum game. If you’re adding new things onto your plate, what are you willing to give up, to stay in balance? Or, if you’re already overworked, you need to give things up to get back to zero. Maybe not forever, but most definitely in the short term, so you’re moving out of stress mode and into logical thinking mode.
Energetic field. Our bodies have a capacity and if we consistently work in the red zone of capacity, we’re going to break down. Understanding what you physically need to do, to fuel and fill up your energy stores is key and it’s different for everyone. Sleep and food are the basic resources here. But what else do you need to employ in order to balance your energies out? Secondly, becoming aware of what depletes our energy stores is equally important. Again, it’s a zero sum game… Balancing enough of the fuel sources against the depletion sources so that you’re not running on empty.
Core Value check in. When you’re living your values, you’ll feel in balance, even during times of high stress or sleepless nights. You’ll receive high levels of satisfaction and joy when values are honoured…. And a sense of displeasure when they're ignored. Can you actually articulate your core values and make them a priority ? I work with clients on this all the time as I believe it's a key guidepost to living your best life.
Overall, it’s not easy to lead a balanced life. It takes work. You have to strategically plan for it and prioritize it…. It doesn’t just magically happen because you will it to. There’s no pill or quick fix. Just practice time, learning moments and the willingness to try again tomorrow.
